Peter Caffall-Davis wrote on 09/15/09 11:44 PM

You've come a long way Paul. But you still have a ways to go. You never were able to crack the commercial legal market, You could have if you had been a bit more teachable or open to listening to your co-workers. I did learn a few good lessons from you. Well I can only think of one actually: Placing blame accomplishes nothing, does nothing toward resolving the problem and prevents forward movement. I enjoyed my time working with you as far as it went. Sorry to hear about your difficulties with the sale. Strive to be and remain teachable.
That is one of mine.

Sam Chapman wrote on 09/17/09 5:33 PM

Your use of the term non-ethics is right on. In many cases, it is not that people are being unethical, but many do not have an understanding of ethics. Little things like manners are not taught by parents like they were when you and I grew up. The same is true with ethics an too many households and schools certainly aren't doing a good job with ethics and character education. We're trying to change that in local schools where I am with a new and very interesting ethics and character ed program and I hope it is a success.

Laura Cimarelli wrote on 09/28/09 2:49 AM

I completely agree with the argument that "helicopter parents" affect the moral standards of their children. Growing up I spent the majority of my time playing outside with my neighbors, without parental supervision. I learned how to interact with my peers; if I said something that hurt my neighbor's feelings, they stopped playing with me. My parents were not there to punish me, but the isolation was enough to teach me that hurting my friends' feelings is not socially acceptable. This helped me determine my own morals and values rather than having my parents’ morals and values thrust upon me. I believe that when children are constantly supervised, they are inclined to do the "right" things to avoid punishment. These children may believe that an action is morally acceptable if they can avoid punishment. Even though I did not have “helicopter parents,” I realized that many of my peers did, and they may believe that cheating is acceptable if they are not caught. Also, these students may justify cheating because getting a failing grade would warrant a greater punishment than cheating itself.

Chanel wrote on 09/28/09 3:18 AM

I find your comment on parents scheduling every minute of every day for them. Most children do not have free time after school but are rather rushed to soccer practice or to their music lesson or both before being carted back home to eat dinner, do their homework and go to bed. I'm finding that this mentality of being told what to do is affecting students in the classroom as well. There have been countless times that a professor or teacher has given my peers and I am free assignment. Write about whatever you want in however many words you need to get your point across. And many times, I have had a peer raise their hand to ask "How many words do you want our paper to be? What topic should I write about?" We are so used to being told what to do that when we have free time or in this case, a choice on what we can write about, we draw a blank rather than get excited about writing about a personal passion or interest. This saddens me, knowing that students today want to know what will give them the "A" paper rather than experience some personal growth. I also find that the most interesting papers are the ones with topics that the writer is most interested in writing about.

Lindsey Murray wrote on 09/28/09 9:17 PM

I think what you said is right on! Some of the most valuable lessons about how the world works are learned through observing, engaging, and experiencing the outcome on your own.
When push comes to shove, the things that "stick" are the things you have come to learn and accept on your own. Life has millions of examples of this. For example, the money you earn yourself is always far more valuable than that which has simply been given to you. The same is true of kids and the ethical guidelines they learn to live by.
Parents are meant to be coaches but the kids must be the players and get in the game themselves to really figure out how it works. It is by going out into "the real world" and experiencing "real world" consequences that we are able to strings series of events together and understand what leads us to the best outcome in a particular situation.
Parents need to look back at what shaped their own character the most and realize what their kids can learn if they step back and let them just "be".

Cole Harry wrote on 10/05/09 3:20 AM

I feel incredibly lucky to have parents that allowed me to make my own decisions and mistakes and gave me a level of independence not enjoyed by most of my peers. One can really see how kids raised in hyper-structured environments compare to those given more liberty in the first year of university. As I formed my group of friends, I realized that one thing we all had in common was that our parents were not the overbearing types. Having kept these same friends throughout university, I've now seen that we have been far more successful than our peers who did not come from similar environments. As a future parent, I will certainly follow this with my own children.

Lizzie Devcich wrote on 10/26/09 11:20 PM

"Helicopter" parents may play the opposite role they initially intended. When the mother decides to stay home to take care of the children and be the guiding force in raising them, she may inhibit their ability to fend for themselves, occupy their free time, and essentially hurt their decision making skills. I continually despise my decision making skills, usually over the most minute things (what to eat for dinner, which movie to rent, etc.) and I now wonder if my indecisiveness is due to this factor beyond my genetics. We need to place more emphasis on experience as the teacher because the best lessons constantly come from my experiences -- or better yet, the experiences of my older siblings!

Vincent wrote on 10/27/09 9:24 PM

As a college student, whenever I overhear or see someone cheating on a test, I am completely repulsed and disappointed. It raises the question of what kind of environment raised these students to think it is acceptable to cheat. Whatever the reason, continuing their actions will likely have troubling consequences in the "real world."

Perhaps if these students had more free time to mature their standards and conduct at an early age, cheating would not be so prevalent. When children are young, they can afford to make mistakes. Having some mischief shows children what society does not tolerate. Parents should guide and help their children understand the ethical dilemmas they find themselves in.

Hanna Nassiri wrote on 01/06/10 9:12 PM

I am always surprised when I hear people complaining about how their friends cheat off of them in test or that others in the class had extra resources. Now im not condoning cheating in anyway but if your angry at your peers for having extra "resources" instead of sitting their and complaining I say go out and get them yourself.
I grew up under what you refer to as "helicopter parents" and although I agree with a lot of what you say I think some of the things overbearing parents can do are also really beneficial. I grew up around kids where there parents were non existent and their children were allowed to do anything and everything they wanted. Sure those kids had more "fun" growing up but by the time they reached their teens I saw how the kids with more "controlling" parents were better at handling situations and challenges they faced.

I agree with your overall claim but what you have said about parents helping guide their children to help them understand ethical dilemmas is probably something every parent could do more of. I owe everything to my parents but I am most grateful for the overall freedom and guidance they gave me to figure out what I believe in and stand for.